Put A Bullet In It

People are agents of time. We are are slaves to seconds and unable to emancipate ourselves. The vision for my blog is to steal the rush from the hands of time and linger just a little longer than normal on a concept or experience and unpack it. It occurred to me that one of the fastest ways to slow the velocity of something is to shoot it...to put a bullet right in the heart of it...It has also occurred to me that the 3 pound hunk of meat in between my ears processes information kinda like this...in the form of snippets and bulleted ideas. Below is some happenings, instances, realities in my life that I've shot in their path to obscurity:

• Within the past month or so I was diagnosed with moderate ADHD...my lovely wife posted a very affirming blog post explaining it. I am thankful there is an explanation for the sound of madness in my life...the lack of follow-through, my habit of interrupting and the constant need for mental stimulation...I started a round of Adderall but stopped taking it just after 5 days because the side effects sucked. Depression...blah...and mad, mad sleep walking...one night I literally ran outside of my house in just my boxers ready to kick some butt...but then I woke up. Adderall is very controlled...apparently college students love the jittery buzz and hyped up alertness it gives...but it left me feeling drained...I can't try another medicine until mid August.
  
• I've been sleep walking since the 4th grade...I've tried figuring out a pattern...I think it might have something to do with stress or fatigue...it's so unbelievably frustrating for my wife and myself...I get embarrassed and then I get mad. Adderall just hyped up the normal nocturnal activity.
• Last night I was giving Merrick a bath and a wasp swan dove into the water. I'm not sure where he even came from, but my reflex was to punch it. Even under the water, it stung me right on my knuckle...by the time I went to bed my hand looked like I was turning from Buddy Love back to Professor Klump.
• When I was on the treadmill yesterday I saw a clip on ESPN that Tim Tebow done got his hair did...like a monk! I was relieved that it was the effects of rookie hazing rather than a statement of his faith.
• On the subject of the pigskin, I am super, super, super pumped for the return of college football season...hoping the Hokies mutilate the Broncos and snuff the hype about Boise on the opening game of the season. Also anticipating Garret Gilbert getting in the saddle and leading the Horns to another National Championship...I love the smack talk and the drama EVERY week of the BCS (though I really would like a playoff situation)
  
• On Sunday we are headed down to Rodanthe, NC to spend a week getting roasted on the beach. This is an annual trip we take with my wife's family...her...entire...family. They typically rent out two gigantic beach houses and stuff them with 40+ people of four generations plus friends...an adventure with two kiddos of our own, and it's virtually free for us!
• We (mostly my lovely wife) are potty training my son Merrick...He has got the peeing thing down like a pro...the other day in "Mall-Mart" as he calls Wal-Mart he went to potty 3 times...5 minutes after the second time he went he started crossing his legs and grabbing at himself and jigging so I took him back. I stood him up on the end of the toilet seat and asked if he was sure he needed to go again...he yelled, "I'm peenin! I'm peenin!" so as I pulled down his pants and he started peeing like a pressure washer...so since he was peeing all over the back of the toilet I put my hand on his chest and flipped him up so he was peeing down into the toilet...I still laugh every time I think of this!
  
• Hulu.com is pretty uber cool (I heard a kid say this the other day and felt old because I don't know today's slang...wonder if I used it right?), except I've caught up on all my favorite shows (Fringe, Lie to Me, House, Bones, Modern Family, Castle) and summer TV stinks, with the exception of Wipe Out...I can't wait for the fall season of TV.
• I have 2 tattoos and am itching for another...or 3...I've been designing them so maybe I'll do a post soon called "Behind the Tat".

These happenings, instances, realities are forever sealed on the world wide web...hyperbole I know, but at least I was able to share them with you.